STRESS/ EMOTIONAL UPSET/ GRIEF

While a certain amount of stress is essential for good health, an overload of stress and/or difficulty coping with stress can have profound effects on the body. Excessive stress causes an overproduction of adrenalin and nor-adrenalin - chemicals which can cause constriction of blood vessels, increased heart rate and hypertension etc. It also causes an increase in cortisol production - this is a major anti inflammatory chemical which has far reaching effects on the body. Excessive production of these chemicals have a suppressing action on the immune system. The following are some of the stress related diseases and conditions - coronary artery disease, stroke, high blood pressure, autoimmune disorders, immune suppression, headaches, muscle tension, asthma, hay fever, irritable bowel syndrome, ulcers, impotency, menstrual irregularities, eczema, acne, diabetes, chronic fatigue, overeating, depression, anxiety, insomnia etc.

Recent world events have caused emotional stress in the form of grief, upset and uncertainty which have added to an overload that many have found themselves in. Some people find themselves slipping into feeling flat or depressed and just not coping.

So what is the remedy? There are things we can do, the following are some suggestions -

1. Make time and space for yourself. Everyone needs this, take the time out you will be more productive in the things you have to do later. Put a "Feel Good factor" into your life - Make a long list of things that you really have liked doing over the last 5-10 years, they can be simple eg. walking on a beach, holding your partner's hand, going to the movies, eating chocolate etc., tick off the ones you have done recently (say in the last 3-6 months) - it can be a surprise just how few you of the "feel good" things you have done recently! Commit yourself to doing many of the unticked things, soon……

2. Manage your time. Assess the value of your time, and how effectively you are using it focus on your priorities so that you know which tasks should be done, which ones could be delegated, and which ones can be dropped. Use the time you have more effectively.

3. Exercise is probably one of the best physical stress-reduction techniques available. It improves your health and reduces stress , it also relaxes tense muscles and helps you to sleep. Fast walking for ˝ hour per day for four days a week or more is particularly beneficial.

4. Put things in perspective. Assess the situation in front of you, it usually helps to talk and share your problems. You may need the help of a counsellor. Try to change only the things which you can change and leave the rest. The important thing is to change ourselves so that our attitudes can cope with the inevitable problems that life throws up. Accepting ourselves as we are and being content with our lot even if it is a heavy one. There is a connection between the difficult situations we overcome and our personal growth. "The most fortunate people on earth are those who think they are"

5. Learn to relax.    RELAXATION TECHNIQUE
   • Lie down on the floor or bed or sit in a comfortable position. Relaxing music with earphones can be helpful. Slow your breathing for a couple of minutes. Then tense your whole body as tightly as you can, then let go and relax.
   • Take your focus to your feet and toes, breathe in and tense the muscles, then think in your mind or say 'feet let go, relax' on the out breath and allow your feet to let go/relax.
   • Continue up to your calf muscles, tensing then relaxing, saying 'let go, relax', still using the slow/shallow breathing technique.
   • Tense your thigh muscles, then breathing out tell your thighs to 'let go, relax' and letting go the tension in your thighs.
   • Squeeze your buttocks/pelvis tightly while breathing in, then breathing out, tell your buttocks/pelvis to 'let go, relax' then relax them.
   • Now focus on the tummy and diaphragm, squeeze and relax. Next the chest, holding the breath, relaxing on the exhalation.
   • Tighten your hands, relax as above.
   • Tighten your forearms, relax as above
   • Tighten your upper arms, relax as above.
   • Follow with the neck and shoulders, tightening then relaxing.
   • Finally squeeze the muscles of the face and head, hold tight, then breathe out and relax.
   • Tense the muscles of your whole body, say 'whole body let go, relax' and let your whole body let go and relax.
   • Next as you breathe out just think 'mind let go, relax'
   • Now you can lie still for some time, say 10-20 minutes and enjoy being completely relaxed from head to toe. It's OK to go to sleep if you want to.

   At every stage after tensing a part of your body think or say 'let go, relax' to the part tensed, This creates a conditioned response to the words 'let go and relax' and in time just thinking or saying 'let go, relax or just relax', your body will relax. It is important to do the relaxation technique regularly and make some special time to set aside for you. Relaxation will nurture your body and mind making you feel better and live longer. After learning to relax with the above technique for some time (say a month) you may find it is unnecessary to tighten muscles, just think of the part to relax and say 'let go, relax' and work through the body as before.

6. Self-Suggestion can be used to directly put positive affirmations and suggestions that are beneficial for you into your subconscious. Use the above relaxation method to get into a relaxed state. Suggestions can be simple affirmations that undo any negative thinking or past experience. You can use them to make adjustments or reinforce confidence to help achieve goals that you have set. Once you have decided what you want to use in suggestions, spend a little time working out a form of words for each suggestion that is short, positive, and powerful. Repeat this to yourself when you have reached relaxed state. Effective use of suggestion can: build confidence, reinforce goals by etching them into your mind, reduce stress, motivate and energise when you are feeling sluggish. Suggestion can be used without the deep relaxation, for example, you might make a suggestion tape to play when you are driving, while still wanting to remain alert. Using suggestion with relaxation just makes it more effective.

7. Meditation helps focus and quieten the mind to produce a feeling of peace. This is especially helpful when we live in a world that has so many distractions. The techniques are simple and effective. Here are two methods:- a) Sit in a comfortable chair or cross legged. Relax using above techniques, focus attention on your breathing, feel the air passing in and out of your nostrils. Slowly reduce the rate of breathing. You can repeat either aloud or in your mind something that is meaningful to you. eg. Love, Lord, Peace, Calm, Ommm etc. b) Sit and relax as above. Concentrate your vision on an object say a flower, a china bowl or a candle etc. Again you can repeat something meaningful to help concentration. If your mind wanders just return your attention back to the object. Start practicing for 5 -10 minutes a day.

8. Desensitise past experiences/anxieties. Relax using above technique. You cannot feel anxiety/panic when you are totally relaxed. Slowly bring some of the disturbing thoughts or situations into your mind. If you are disturbed by the thoughts pull back. Bit by bit you can introduce more on subsequent occasions until you are desensitised to reacting to them.

9. Live, love, laugh and be happy. No matter how tough things get we all have to go on. It's a time for being close together and a time to nurture and help others who aren't coping as well as we are. " All that matters is the love with which one does what one does"